Digital 'Heads Up'

Hey guys, I found some awesome alternate rules for Mighty Empires in this month's Black Gobbo. You can find that on the Games Workshop website. Give me some feedback on whether or not you are interested in putting them into our games. I vote yes.

Also, 1,000 points is for suckers. We're moving up to...*bum bum bum* 1,500 points! I know, it's intimidating, but I'd love to be able to field a Warboss someday. So write up some lists and see how feasible it is. I know that Shawn and Scott just got a big influx of models, so that will help. E-mail me with any problems, and we'll see you Sunday.

Bloomin' 'Umies!

We came up on da 'umies outside da woods. A rock lobba, some 'umies wif bows an' some wif puny spears. Da only ones I wuz keen on were da shiny ones on dere horsies, dey's da only ones what would put up a good fight. Me boyz lined up, 'ungry fer blood. I gave da Waaagh! an' all da boyz started forward, an' da spidey gobbos even got a 'ead start ta show 'ow 'ard dey wuz. Da 'umies wuz all scared, an' 'ardly moved. Dey let loose wif dere rock lobba but me boyz didn't even blink as it smashed right behind 'em. Gork wuz wif us, alright! Da scrawny night gobbos on da squigs ran up an' wuz runnoff by da puny arrerz. We laughed, 'cause we knew dey would run at da first chance.

Dem spidey gobbos musta 'ad lightnin' fer chow dat mornin', dey wuz almost at da 'umies already! Da gobbo's ran dere squigs off da field, an' I made sure dey'd pay after we finished da 'umies. Da spideys crashed into da 'umies at da rock lobba and killed 'em all 'cept one bloke, an' 'e only stayed 'cause dere flag wuz near. Fat lot 'o good dat did 'im, da spideys chopped 'im up good! Da boyz on me left wuz crushed by da shiny 'umies an' dey ran off and wuz cut down by 'em. Da ovver 'umies charged right at us, and we wuz ready fer 'em! Some ov da boyz got crumped, but we wuz still itchin' fer more fightin'!

Dem 'umies ain't so tough after dey charge, and we made 'em wish dey was wif dere mummies! Dey don't know when to quit, so'z dey stayed around for more crumpin'. Da gobbos on dere spideys, wif nobody ta fight, gots ta fightin' wif demselves! Stupid gits. Den me Black Orc boyz finally gets to da fight and show dem 'umies what a good crumpin' is really about! Da 'umies an' dere boss all runnofft da field, tails between dere legs! We turned around to wait fer da ovver 'umies to come and wet our choppas.

While da spideys wuz fightin wif demselves, da 'umies started shootin' arrerz at 'em. Dat shook dem up but good, and da gobbos let dem arrer 'umies 'ave it. Da 'umies ran away from da spideys and da gobbo's wanted to chase 'em, but dere spideys wuz busy eatin' whut wuz left. Den dey turned to fight agin, an' da spideys finished 'em off. Da 'umies wif da puny spears came at us straight away, and we gave 'em a good choppin' fer dere trouble! Dey ran away, but we wuz right on dere 'eels. Da Black Orcs wuz holdin' dere own, but den dey wuz all run tru by da shiny 'umies, and whut wuz left got trampled by dere horsies. Me and me boyz turned to face da ovver 'umies.

"Hur hur hur... its time for summore crumpin', boyz! WAAAGH!!!"

News For Sunday, 11/16/07

Hey everyone. This has been a great week for the start of our campaign. I think everyone agrees that Scott and Shawns' battle reports were totally awesome. I hope mine gets the same reviews. We will be playing at Scott's house on Sunday at 1:30pm. He says it's really cold, so if anyone has a space heater they can bring that would be great. We're going to finish up Round 1, then start Round 2 and hopefully at least get through the battles. If you need directions to Scott's place, give him a phone call. 315-256-6789. Hope to see you all there!

Maizie Struck Us Hard

Lord, I regret to report:

As we set up our cannon for battle, we heard the soft sounds of what seemed to be thunder in the distance. "Rain!" we shouted, thinking that with the mud on the field we could get the advantage, given man's absurdly high center of gravity. Much to our dismay, as we saw the cack-handed beast come around the tree line we realized what should have been on our minds straight away, and I said aloud to my men, "Of course these coward scum brought that giant numpty heap of filth." I could over hear murmurs of fear coming from the younger Thunderers just to the left of us (most of their beards barely reached their belts, for cryin' out loud!). I knew right then, with a recently promoted general at the helm, we were in for some real argy-bargy.

BALLS-UP!, by the time we saw the giant, we had already set up, and we didn't have time to move. With our flank covered by twenty of some of the best Miners I ever knew, I had confidence that we'd be okay, though.

When the battle got underway we immediately had forty or so shandy drinking men coming straight up the middle, right at us; we fired a couple a shots, and with the great (and somewhat surprising) accuracy of those Thunderers, soundin' off like a bunch of bangers, we took care of them, no problem; sent 'em all a-tabbin' in the opposite direction. Right then it hit me...

Where's the General of this disgusting horde of nob gobblers? Looking east I saw this modest group buggers heading out with a brolly of dogs leadin' the way. DOGS?! Who brings their house pets with 'em! The dogs were put out easy enough. The men however, put our Miners to shame.

Not to wibble on like the old fool I am, Sir, but that grotty giant came around the corner, tripped like the oaf he is and killed the General, straight away and half the comp'ny. I couldn't believe my eyes. Never got a chance to prove 'emself. Then he started eating the Thunderers! EATING! Only a real coward would bring such a monster to the battle field.

-Master Engineer Yompin, Son of Yompon.

Battle Report

As the cowardly stubbies came into view, I could tell that they would just stand there and shoot like they had every other time that we had clashed. Some would say that they were “Stalwart” or “Stubborn”. I call them cowards. Anyone who would rather just stand and watch the blood flow from a distance rather than stand on the body parts before they’ve turned cold, is simply….far to revolted by blood for warfare.

Spreading out as to envelope the stubbies, my warriors advance on the cowardly “bearded gnomes”. Myself along with the most experienced of my warriors flanked along the left of their main line with warhounds leading the way. The young, but definitely bloodthirsty barbaric northmen advanced towards the enemy head on. On the other flank, was Horace, A rather large bumbling moron. Dumb as he may be, very combat effective and a very impressive sight to behold.

“No Man’s Land”

As was stated earlier, they just stood there and fired the cannon and their guns. It seemed as though they didn’t even want to fight. As the sounds of the screams of my men in the sights of the cannon, filled the air. My blood began to boil with anticipation of battle. They had their orders…go forward.

“Contact finally”

Horace was the first to make contact. He promptly threw himself onto a mass of the stubbies at the same time that the other group of hounds crashed into their flank. Overwhelmed by his massive weight, the remainder fled for their lives. Heh, I knew they didn’t want to fight.

When the hounds in front of us dove into the ranks of the enemy, I could not see what was happening, but the bloodshed and screams that ensued made me smile. I could sense that khorne would be pleased this day. As the remainder of the hounds fled from the stubbies, a cannonball tore through the ranks taking a few out. Heh, I knew they didn’t want to fight.

Drawing closer to battle. I could see the fear in their eyes, could smell their soiled trousers. Their hands were trembling as we approached. As we crashed into their ranks, the killing started, the only reason that I exist. To bathe in the blood of my enemies. Cut one down and another took his place. With vision going red, I continued to dispatch the child sized dwarves. They didn’t even fight back, heh, they couldn’t. as soon as they were within range, they were bleeding and dying until the last few turned tail and ran like the cowards that they are. Heh, I knew they didn’t want to fight.

At this point, Horace was eating the stubbies with the guns. Aparently this was unsettling to them because they turned and fled. After the battle, I noticed that Horace had the indention of the dwarven general’s helmet on the shield that he wears around his gut.

Cowards. I knew they didn’t want to fight.

Kharhas

This Sunday

Hey guys. It certainly feels like it's been a long time since we got together. I was thinking that instead of playing this Sunday, we should have a painting day. If we all get together and start painting things, then maybe it will inspire us to get our armies finished. I've been kinda bumming because it seems like every time we get together no one (including myself, for the most part) has made any real headway in getting our army done. So hopefully this will turn things around. Make sure your guys are all primed and ready to be painted, bring your army books for inspiration and we'll all have a great time.

Warband Qustions

Um i was reading the instructions to Warband and i was wondering how the army actually grows when i thought we lost models in fights because we use the same list every game. also I can not play on 11/11 because I am working in Saranac Village on the ropes course. Sorry.